Who Cares About Sports?

When I think of fantasy sports, I don't think of female participation.  Even now, as I "manage" fantasy hockey, baseball, and football  teams, I don't think of them...of us...participating.

Really, I never cared about sports.  I was barely athletic, if you consider athletic to mean that one can run fast.

As the runt of my t-ball team, I dreaded the plate. I also had no idea what to do with the ball when I was unfortunate enough to be involved in a play. I only remembered one rule:  when you don't know what to do with the ball, throw it to the pitcher.  That tip came in handy when I was covering first base and instead of tagging the batter running towards me, I threw it to the pitcher.  (By the way, in T-ball, the "pitcher" has nothing to do besides stand on the mound. When I threw her the ball, she finally had a purpose. You're welcome.)  Mercifully, the coach put me in outfield - not the right, center, or left outfield, but the outfield that you find yourself in when told to go, "further...further....no, keep going....not there yet".  That might sound crappy, but I was grateful.

At home, I was an annoyance to my older brothers. They were smart enough to figure out how to let me play along - because they had to - but without me getting in the way of the fun stuff.  For example, when the three of us played football, I was designated as all-time quarterback. This just meant that I would throw the ball long and my two brothers would tackle each other and score the touchdowns.  It was my job to stand there and be ready for the next throw. When we played baseball, I was the all-time runner.  No need for me to pitch or hit.  If the ball was in play, I was running.



During the summers of my high school years, I dabbled in basketball, tennis, rollerblading, and even badminton with my friends.   I hated going to the high school games, even though I was a booster. And, the only sports I watched on television were gymnastics and ice skating during the Olympics.  By the way,  TV on Sundays was the worst for me - wrestling in the morning, football the rest of the day, and occasionally the ultimate bore...bowling!

JENNIFER LOVE HEWITT TAKING TENNIS SERIOUSLY

When I met my husband, I was officially introduced to professional sports.  If you heard our vows, then you know he loves the Bills, Mets, Sabres and Lakers. So do I!  I never cared about the Atlanta Braves, but now I despise them simply because they're in the Mets division.  I never had a chance to root for a winning team. In my house, our teams were the New Orleans Saints* and the Cleveland Browns; you know how that went down for the past thirty years.

*with the insane exception of recent seasons.

Because G loves sports so much, and he is involved with fantasy teams year round, I wanted to know more about it.  Mainly, it gives us a chance to bond over something he loves.  I wanted to be able to hold real conversations with him about his passion, as he does for me.  I mean, what wife doesn't want the opportunity to turn to her husband and trash a bullshit episode of Top Model or Project Runway with him?  By the way, ladies, those shows often have models undressing and trying on skimpy clothes, that's how you hook 'em. By the time they've quietly become disappointed with the caliber of  the girls - right, Tyra? - they're into the storyline. Plus, I tend to fast-forward through the bickering and annoying stuff and keep it to the competition.

In a few weeks, my Fumble Formation fantasy football league will hold its player draft.  I look forward to competing against G's team, and being able to trash talk when our teams play against each other, as well as have chats about trade possibilities and player stats.  Plus, it gives me a stock in the games.  Thanks to DirecTv's sports package there's a game on all the time - all year long.  And, without something to care about, the games can get insanely boring. I'm looking at you, baseball!

I'm still learning.  Even with my own teams I have a hard time remembering my roster. And, I don't always know what's going on in the game, or who the players are. But, G and I enjoy laughing at things like Tejada's refusal to discuss his real age ("I'm not here to talk about dis") or "Playoffs! Playoffs?", and my favorite Mother's Day wish made by Ralph Kiner, "Happy Birthday to all the Mothers out there".